Oyster Restoration in Chesapeake Bay Essay Sample free essay sample

Shellfish reef Restoration has been drilled in the Chesapeake Bay for in excess of 100 mature ages using straightforward techniques. Shellfish hatchlings connect to shells of different clams doing middle. raised sedimentations of aggregative shells ( reefs ) . There are enormous. 10km2oyster reefs off Louisiana and Mississippi holding clam shell sedimentations more prominent than 10 thousand profound. These reefs are key home justification for a wide variety of marine creatures that fill in as crucial eatage species for important marine fish populaces. The main occupations and threats to these reef biological systems are digging/digging for shell and structure stuffs. underside trawling store. contamination and changed salt governments ( remotion of new water streams ) . Appropriate shellfish turn out nations may miss adequate underside substrate for beneficial common populaces to blast. Clam Restoration aquaculture renews base substrate with cleaned. unencrusted shell ( cultch ) for shellfish hatchlings in the H2O section ( meroplankton ) to settle ( set ) and turn out as adult channel feeders. We will compose a custom paper test on Shellfish Restoration in Chesapeake Bay Essay Sample or on the other hand any comparable subject explicitly for you Don't WasteYour Time Recruit WRITER Just 13.90/page In add-on. Rebuilding aquaculture endeavors have advanced into network based ventures called shellfish cultivation ( Rickards. Suchman and DuPaul ) . During the 1980s the Virginia Institute of Marine Science. USA. energized a gathering of recreational shellfish agriculturists to human progress clams using planting strategies. The Chesapeake plan has developed to 2000 members. spread to neighboring areas †including to a major arrangement in Maryland. USA. furthermore, has been newly received in Mobile Bay. Alabama. USA. Clam cultivating Begins with little seed shellfish acquired from an aquaculture incubation facility where broodstock are generated. Eggs are prepared in the H2O segment. what's more, planktonic hatchlings choose to gave cultch ( squashed stone or intrude on shell ) . where they are developed to the adolescent stage. Coasting coop bins made of PVC outlines with plastic or metal work annoying are utilized to keep adolescent clams. The bushels are suspended simply underneath the H2O surface. Crates have palpebras to aside from pirates. Work side are cleaned all the time by nurserymans to permit great H2O trade. At 2 months old enough. seed clams are dispersed to nurserymans for seting in nations considered appropriate for shellfish growout. A propelled Restoration aquaculture undertaking in Maryland. USA. depends on the theory that seagrasses have declined due to reductions in clam populaces in Chesapeake Bay. Decrease in clam separating limit because of populace reduction would take to more noteworthy H2O turbidness and orderly reductions in seagrasses. As seagrasses decrease. they are less ready to nail down store. which would take to a much more noteworthy reduction in H2O clarity inferable from expanded residue resuspension. Examination laborers are currently chipping away at techniques to remake the two seagrasses and shellfish ( Wieland ) . The Restoration Project The endeavor study portrays exercises that will loan to the Restoration of clam biomass and populaces in the Virginia parts of the Chesapeake Bay. Development and related exercises to be embraced in the proposed endeavor incorporate and related exercises to be attempted in the proposed endeavor incorporate creation new shellfish home ground. seting sickness free squabble and adult brood stocks on reestablished home ground. what's more, moving sickness safe disagreement on-shell to different pieces of the sound. The rules accentuate uplifting biogenic stableness and biological administrations. exercises that are predictable with the approval to remake home ground. Fruitful Restoration will require a since quite a while ago run conspire that is connected to committedness and backing. Its assault does vaguely incorporate Restoration for the goals of back uping a business piscary ( Burreson et al. ) . Despite the fact that the answers to requests refering the great beyond of clam Restoration are non clear from fundamental outcomes. exploratory and pilot Restoration endeavors do gracefully the balance for elucidating future heading plans. Ongoing clam Restoration plans have exploited before endeavors and the exercises learned by before research laborers and have fused a significant number of the organic and capable elements that were aforesaid distinguished as fundamental for progress. Besides. huge numbers of the political and financial battles have been set aside in endeavors to focus on explicit heading and Restoration points. A gathering of clam specialists met in 1999 to create proposals to remake and secure the shellfish assets of Chesapeake Bay. They recognized irreplaceable constituents of clam Restoration endeavors ; working of 3-dimensional reefs. continuing enduring asylum reefs. what's more, picking destinations where characteristic spatfall will occur. The proposed closes were to reproduce 10 % of the notable profitable reef land zone. to recreate a supportable open piscary. to increase common enrolling. furthermore, to show the effectivity of havens. The agreement of a gathering of clam specialists was that Restoration endeavors must go off from simply fishery-driven points so as to focus on biological points. The Restoration convention ought to be to reproduce and pull off clam populaces for their natural worth yet in such a mode, that a practical piscary can last. A baywide clam examination is by and by being directed under the sponsorship of the Chesapeake Bay Program. The central points are to create quantitative projections of the strength of grouped heading choices. to create heading proposals dependent on the most organically strong blends of alternatives. what's more, to create succinct suggestions for pull offing business clam piscaries predictable with Restoration closes ( Wieland ) . At the point when the essential focus on shellfish asset Restoration is to build arrivals. estimating achievement is direct. The financial come back from expanded arrivals and gross incomes joins with the monetary advantages to arranged industry divisions gives a mensurable outcome to Restoration plans. The total of cash spent on Restoration plans can be contrasted straight and the grosss produced by the gather home and offer of clams. From 1993 through 2002. clam crops have non expanded with expanding outgos and endeavors from Virginia’s Restoration plans ( Burreson et al. ) . Plants Cited: Burreson. Eugene. et Al. â€Å"Chesapeake Bay Oyster Restoration. †Chesapeake Research Consortium( 1999 ) . Rickards. Dr. William L. . Dr. Cynthia L. Suchman. what's more, Dr. William DuPaul. â€Å"Oyster Restoration in the Chesapeake Bay: Can Native and Asiatic Oysters Co-Exist? †Sea Grant Virginia Research( 2006 ) . Wieland. Robert. â€Å"Managing Oyster Harvests in Maryland’s Chesapeake Bay. †NOAA Chesapeake Bay Office. Non-local Oyster Research Program.( 2007 ) .

Absorbance of light by a transition metal complex investigation Essay

Presentation Generally known as progress metals, d square components have mostly filled d sublevels in at least one of their oxidation states. It is in the main line of progress components that the 3d sub-level is fragmented. These d square components show certain trademark properties, for example, various oxidation states, capacity to frame complex particles, hued mixes and great reactant properties. As far as factor oxidation states, d square components typically have a +2 oxidation number which relates to the loss of the two 4s electrons (as it is simpler to lose the 4s electrons than the 3d electrons). Change metals can have variable oxidation states on the grounds that the ionization energies take into account up to two 3d electrons to be lost. Since change metals are generally little in size, the progress metal particles draw in species that are wealthy in electrons †ligands (unbiased atoms or negative particles that contain non-holding pair of electrons †which when covalently reinforced with and structure complex particles. Since the d orbitals generally split up into two gatherings (high and low) experiencing significant change metal complex particles, the vitality required to advance a d electron into the higher split level relates with a specific frequency in the obvious area, which is retained when light goes through the mind boggling particle. Change metal generally then shows the rest of the vitality/light †the corresponding shading. In this examination, the distinctive absorbance of these shaded arrangements will be researched by differing the quantity of moles of the progress metal in the arrangement. As indicated by the Beer-Lambert law, absorbance is straightforwardly corresponding to the focus and that there is a logarithmic reliance between the absorbance and the centralization of the substance, this relationship is as appeared in figure 1 and 2. In the diagram portrayal of the Beer-Lambert law, the logarithmic relationship can clearly be seen †as the grouping of the arrangement expands, the alignment bend turns out to be not so much direct but rather more level. This is most likely because of the immersion of shade of the arrangement. Furthermore, the chart additionally shows that the relationship begins at the source and is commonly direct at lower focuses. In this examination, Nickel (II) Sulfate will be utilized as the change metal and H2O will be utilized as the ligand. The intricate particle framed will along these lines be a hexaaquanickel(II) complex particle, Ni (H2O) 6 2+. It has a coordination number of 6 and is of an octahedral shape. (Microsoft Encarta, 2007) Point To explore how the convergence of hexaaquanickel(II) particles (Ni (H2O) 6 2+) in arrangement influences the absorbance of red light (660nm) by estimating it with a colorimeter. Speculation As the centralization of hexaaquanickel(II) particles expands, the absorbance of red light1 will likewise increment. This is so on the grounds that as expressed in the Beer-Lambert law, the absorbance of light is straightforwardly corresponding to the focus. Moreover, as the focus builds, there are more particles of the intricate particles inside the answer for associate with the light that is being transmitted †consequently an expanded absorbance at higher fixations. Moreover, regardless of the logarithmic relationship, I anticipate that my information should show a direct relationship rather in light of the fact that the quantity of moles I am estimating red absorbance against is somewhat low (most extreme 0.5 moles), so while it is lacking to see the unmistakable logarithmic bend; the straight increment in the first place would in any case be clear. Factors Free †Concentration of hexaaquanickel(II) particles (0.0313mol, 0.0625mol, 0.125mol, 0.250mol, 0.500mol) Subordinate †Absorbency of red light (660nm) Controlled †Volume of arrangement (25cm㠯⠿â ½ per diverse mol arrangement) Gear Strategy 1) Measure 6.57g of nickel sulfate with an electronic parity and spot in a 250cm㠯⠿â ½ container 2) Measure 50cm㠯⠿â ½ of deionised water with 50cm㠯⠿â ½ estimating chamber and fill the 250cm㠯⠿â ½ container with the nickel sulfate to make a 0.5mol nickel sulfate arrangement 3) Mix the arrangement altogether with a glass mixing bar, ensure the arrangement is straightforward (not dim) and no remainders of the nickel sulfate ought to be available in the arrangement 4) Label the five 50cm㠯⠿â ½ volumetric jars: 0.03125mol, 0.0625mol, 0.125mol, 0.25mol and 0.5mol 5) Pipette 25cm㠯⠿â ½ of the recently made nickel sulfate arrangement from the 250cm㠯⠿â ½ measuring utencil and spot into volumetric jar named â€Å"0.5mol† 6) Pipette another 25cm㠯⠿â ½ from the measuring utencil and spot into volumetric carafe marked â€Å"0.25mol† 7) Measure and pipette 25cm㠯⠿â ½ of deionised water and include into â€Å"0.25mol† 8) Mix completely 9) Measure and pipette 25cm㠯⠿â ½ from â€Å"0.25mol† and include into â€Å"0.125mol† 10) Repeat stages 7 to 8 however include the water into â€Å"0.125mol† 11) Measure and pipette 25cm㠯⠿â ½ from â€Å"0.125mol† and include into â€Å"0.0625mol† 12) Repeat stage 10 however include into the water â€Å"0.0625mol† 13) Measure and pipette 25cm㠯⠿â ½ from â€Å"0.0625mol† and include into â€Å"0.0313 mol† 14) Repeat stage 10 however include into the water†0.0313mol† 15) Connect the PASPORT colorimeter to the PC 16) Select to quantify red (660nm) absorbance 17) After every one of the five arrangements have been made, name five cuvettes indistinguishable marks from the volumetric carafes (place on cover, cautious not to have any of the name on the cuvette itself) 18) Fill each marked cuvette with its comparing volumetric cup name with a dropper 19) Fill the staying unlabeled cuvette with water 20) Place the cuvette with water into the colorimeter and press green catch to align, don't do anything until the green light switches off without anyone else 21) Place the cuvette named â€Å"0.03125mol† into the colorimeter †press start and stop subsequent to getting a consistent perusing 22) Record the information 23) Repeat stages 21-22 until all marked cuvettes have been estimated for red absorbance Information Table Focus/mol dm-à ¯Ã¢ ¿Ã¢ ½ Red light (660nm) absorbance Vulnerabilities Vulnerabilities (cm3) Estimating chamber à ¯Ã¢ ¿Ã¢ ½1.0cm㠯⠿â ½ Bulb pipette à ¯Ã¢ ¿Ã¢ ½0.06 cm㠯⠿â ½ Electronic gauge à ¯Ã¢ ¿Ã¢ ½0.01g Focus (mol/dm㠯⠿â ½) Vulnerability Charts Conversation and Conclusion It tends to be seen from the chart that there is a direct connection between the measure of red light assimilated and the convergence of hexaaquanickel(II) particles. It can likewise be concluded that as the fixation expands, the red light retention increments at double the rate. In any case, it is fascinating to take note of that the line of best fit doesn't begin at the cause, yet at (0, 0.0623) as the condition got from the line of best fit states, recommending that regardless of demonstrating a reasonable direct pattern, my information is exact yet not precise. This is potentially because of hardware blemish, for instance the cuvette, which will be examined in the assessment. In any case, it is as yet clear that, as expressed in my theory, as the fixation builds, the odds of light communicating with the perplexing particle atoms likewise increment, consequently yielding a higher light (red, for this situation) retention. While the facts confirm that the Beer-Lambert law expresses the connection between grouping of a substance and its retentiveness has a logarithmic relationship, my information is direct on the grounds that the convergences of my tried arrangements were fairly low, so if I somehow managed to proceed with my trial and make progressively thought nickel sulfate arrangements, I would hope to see the bend become non-straight as fixation increments on the grounds that the arrangement will in the long run become soaked. In this, taking everything into account, my speculation compares with the outcomes: the connection between red absorbance and grouping of hexaaquanickel(II) particles is very clear †as the focus builds, the red absorbance add itionally increments. Assessment One viewpoint I can improve my technique is utilizing the equivalent cuvette and a similar way each time for estimating all the various arrangements, as it has been noticed that the cuvettes we have been as of now utilizing are not consummately built and may vary with the separation as light goes through. This will help improve the exactness of the outcomes and a significant perspective to think about, on the grounds that additionally expressed in the Beer-Lambert law, the length where the light goes through likewise has any kind of effect in the retention of light (the more drawn out the compartment is, the more odds of light communicating with the particles of the arrangement). Another perspective was in the setting up the various arrangements, since I had weakened every arrangement utilizing similar arrangements from previously, so the vulnerability of each would normally consistently develop (last vulnerability of 4.31%) †for instance, on the off chance that I had unintentionally made a 0.052 mol nickel sulfate arrangement, at that point the following arrangement I weakened from that arrangement would not be 0.025 mol as proposed. One approach to see through this impediment is to maybe set up every arrangement independently to stay away from a development of vulnerabilities. Likewise, another approach to make this examination progressively indisputable and nitty gritty could be expanding the various measures of centralization of the nickel sulfate arrangement, as I just had 5 distinct fixations. Catalog Clark, J. (2007). The Beer-Lambert law. In Absorption spectra. Recovered January 15, 2008, from http://www.chemguide.co.uk/examination/uvvisible/beerlambert.html Microsoft(r) Encarta(r) Online Encyclopedia. (2007). Complex. Recovered January 17, 2008, from http://au.encarta.msn.com/encyclopedia_781538720/Complex.html Neuss, G. (2007). Deciding the convergence of a component. In Chemistry course friend (p. 276). Oxford University Press. 1 Beca

Leadership Strategy and Innovation Resource Management

Question: Talk about the Leadership Strategy and Innovation Resource Management. Answer: Presentation Twitter was fused in the year 2007 in Delaware. It has its central station in San Francisco California. The organization bargains in items and administrations for clients by giving promoters, engineers and a stage for the information accomplices. Jack Dorsey's Brave and exceptional, the board style has helped Twitter in making a distinction. He possesses a select style that may appear to be remarkable. It has helped him to build up the most envisioned and compelling business principlesin California. Twitters strategic to give everybody a capacity to make and offer thoughts and data. Twitters boss objective is to expand investor essentialness in the interim seeing to the laws of the wards in which it works and consistently watching the most elevated moral principles. Twitter has been an accomplishment story created by three individuals regardless of confronting reactions for their inventive thought at first. They have taken care of troubles in the underlying four years. It was a fanta sy materialized for a beginning up association to build up a system and to make predominant interpersonal interaction sites in the virtual innovation world. Reason for the Existence of the Company A Company crucial to set imperative philosophies that guides in vital dynamic. There is various statement of purpose investigation strategies utilized so as to feature relationship in the middle of an organization crucial execution methodology. The Ashridge crucial advances and gives a hypothetical layout for surveying the greatness and appropriateness of statements of purpose. The model has four components. The model aides in making a relationship in the middle of the statement of purpose while conforming to every one of the four components of the Ashridge crucial. It helps in dynamic whether the association has consented to the issues it has looked in achieving objectives and what it has done in completing the hierarchical objectives. The workers are searching for a chance to get a feeling of affirmation from the business. The workers need something other than compensation, security and an opportunity to enlarge their capacity. There is a need of Sense of Mission significant for an association to develop under a different situation. Twitter is concentrating on accomplishing the crucial a powerful way under the present advancement occurring by expanding the effectiveness of the association. There are various utility that twitter is following so as to oversee inward and outside possibilities. Twitter is along these lines rousing and propelling directors and workers to accomplish more elevated level of execution. There is a need to coordinate asset distribution in a standard way so the target of the association can be accomplished. Twitter has helped in adjusting the difficult clashes of individual interests of various partners whose intrigue lies with the association. This has helped twitter in accomplishing ability to read a compass while acclimatizing the prerequisites relating according to the ongoing needs. The primary motivation behind an association is to help shared measures in the middle of workers. Twitter has soaked up sufficient measure of social qualities in the workers to help the enthusiasm of the association. It has helped it to migrate assets productively during emergencies to advance towards corporate execution. Procedure and particular capacity Twitter development procedure relies upon their capacity to increment and keep hold of profoundly talented HR. They have faith in Recognizing, enrolling, preparing and coordinating skillful people that require extensive time, consumption and intrigue. There object is to recruit new workers who increases the value of the association and keep on fixating on keeping their best representatives. Twitter has offered a large number of its workers a critical development inside a brief time of residency. They can get impressive income from offer of value in the business sectors. This has made a decrease in the motivation keep working with them. There is a significant level of Competition for amazingly prepared representatives particularly in San Francisco Bay Area, California. They are wanting to put away significant measure of money and value to draw consideration of new workers and to hold the old representatives for the improvement of the association. Twitter gets that, on the off chance t hat they can't effectively include and hold representatives, their capacity to accomplish vital objectives will decay. This may hamper their business on a since quite a while ago run. Their corporate culture has increased the value of accomplish objectives. They comprehend that there is a persistent need to keep up culture while developing, as they may lose improvement, inventiveness and joint exertion. On the off chance that they don't center upon the ceaseless development, their business might be hurt (Avolio and Yammarino, 2013). Twitter has a goal under the worldwide development procedure to improve items and administrations by procuring different organizations so as to include fabricating limit or comparing items and innovations. In the mean time they have empowered venture arrangement and technique to protect capital and bolster liquidity needs. They don't go into ventures for exchanging or theoretical purposes however to increase the value of the investors in an effective way. The rationale of twitter is to amplify abundance of the investors. Twitter is encountering a critical requirement for exceptionally gifted representatives which incorporates senior administration, specialists, originators and item supervisors. Their development system relies on the capacity to keep dynamic representatives and to include extra profoundly talented workers. They are confronting an elevated level of rivalry from different organizations to hold/include gifted representatives particularly in the San Francisco Bay Area. There is a tremendous rivalry from the different business associations. They are ceaselessly going up against on the web and versatile organizations with different organizations in the innovation business. Twitter emphatically accepts that their capacity to contend well for profoundly talented representatives relies upon factors like workplace, creativity and improvement, opportunities to deal with predicament, huge and fundamental items, the status and intensity of their image; and repayment. Standards of the organization Twitter has fundamentally settled after battling against the elements referenced previously. Notwithstanding, they realize that their industry is growing rapidly and it is getting hard to get by under the serious condition. There are sure Risk Factors which are basically to be given significance. Neglecting to contend effectively for clients and promoter there can be a misfortune in the development of the association. This could hurt the business and viable outcomes. Twitter comprehends the significance of profoundly talented workers to work their business. On the off chance that it can't recruit, keep and motivate their workers we don't keep on building up our corporate culture or keep up our fundamental beliefs as we develop and advance, we might be not able to cultivate the advancement, inventiveness and cooperation we accept we have to help our development. Also, liquidity accessible to our representative security holders following our first sale of stock could prompt incongruities of riches among our workers, which could unfavorably affect relations among workers and our way of life all in all. Our progress from a privately owned business to an open organization may bring about a change to our corporate culture, which could hurt our business. Twitter is furnishing with a gather knowledge to different organizations to guarantee a nonstop development to the workers and the association. Twitter has demonstrated a few times that it is novel and has unmistakable characteristics than the other association. Facebook and LinkedIn bolster longer types of appearance though Twitters group has empowered the in succession input circle, and an idealistic simpleness. Twitter licenses clients to conceal their personalities. While their characters might be covered up however they can in any case share their conclusion about a topic straightforwardly via web-based networking media stage. It has gotten primarily important while isolating it from the other online life stage. President drove Management Sessions The enormous piece of developing a vigorous organization starts with building a solid supervisor group. Costolo coordinates management at Twitter meeting in any event once a quarter. They are using various strategies while denying the utilization of slides by utilizing stories and utilizing his encounters to empower the group. This has assisted the group to comprehend the administration supposition with setting a case of immense administration all through the organization. He is at present working on different business tasks so as to advance the enthusiasm of every person. Constant estimation of execution Twitter has Underpin the distinctive capacity and the Value System in its working. A large portion of the organizations play out a representative happiness study seldom or on the double in a year. Twitter executes beat audit in at regular intervals. The review depends on Short and concentrated, around 15 inquiries that are utilized to gauge existing commitment levels and it likewise incorporates open finished inquiries to comprehend the point of view of the representatives. Concentrate on the Core Competency By and large representative arrangement endeavors flop as they are progressively confused and automatic. Twitter centers around esteeming facilitate that is the reason they have built up a 5 center program for each worker. They are centered around capabilities as well as rather, those capacities which are basic for an association to develop constantly. There 5 center projects include: Communication, Development, Change, Collaboration, and Direction. Twitter needs workers to learndaily by making center aptitudes so as to concentrate on helping representatives. Certifiable brave criticism. Twitter is centered around giving ceaseless inputs to its representatives that has helped the association to have an amazing effect while contrasting with different contenders. Development is an e

What Exactly Are Goals

â€Å"I want to move from the buy side to the sell side.† â€Å"I want to shift from technology consulting to investment banking.† Not goals. An engineer once said to me, â€Å"I want to go into either finance or consulting.† Not goals. A goal isn’t something you want, it’s something you do, something you want to achieve, an impact you want to have, and the process you plan on implementing in order to get there. Therefore, a goal needs to be specific. Start with two key components: Industry Function A third key component for many people is geography, if it is integral to the goal (e.g., developing solar energy in northern Africa). Then add the â€Å"do† part – what the work will actually consist of, and what you hope to accomplish. Here are some examples that incorporate the above elements: I plan to return to operations but work at a higher, decision making level, such as Senior Operations Manager, in an East Asian semiconductor firm or a related industry. In this role, I would, for example, oversee $XXX operations, a global high-tech supply chain, and manage a diverse range of technical and business professionals. Currently I’m a BPR consultant; I plan to shift to strategy consulting at a top global firm such as Bain or McKinsey, ideally focusing on clients in the pharma/biomedical space, and help them set up operations in Eastern Europe. To wrap up this section, I’ll add a couple of cautions about this phase of the process: It’s true that your short-term goals operate as a means towards achieving your long-term goals, but don’t simply focus on what you will learn, the experience you will gain, and the people you will meet; short-term goals should also include the elements noted above – what you want to do and accomplish/contribute. Ensure that your goals really require the MBA education. Of course, any learning is helpful for almost any endeavor; but the adcoms want to see that you really need the resources they offer, which they view as precious and not to be squandered. (And they’re right!) Do you need help identifying, defining, and writing about your goals? Work one-on-one with an expert admissions advisor who will help you clarify your goals and present them to the adcom so you get ACCEPTED. Learn more about MBA Admissions Services here. â€Å"What Exactly Are Goals?†Ã‚  is excerpted from the Accepted  guide,  Why MBA?  Click here to download the  complete guide. Cindy Tokumitsu has advised hundreds of successful applicants, helping them gain acceptance to top MBA and EMBA programs in her 20 years with Accepted. She would love to help you too. Want Cindy to help you get Accepted? Click here to get in touch! Related Resources: †¢Ã‚  MBA Admissions A-Z: 26 Great Tips, a free guide †¢ The Importance of Defining Your MBA Goal †¢ Your MBA Goals Essay: Get Ready, Get Set, THINK! What Exactly Are Goals â€Å"I want to move from the buy side to the sell side.† â€Å"I want to shift from technology consulting to investment banking.† Not goals. An engineer once said to me, â€Å"I want to go into either finance or consulting.† Not goals. A goal isn’t something you want, it’s something you do, something you want to achieve, an impact you want to have, and the process you plan on implementing in order to get there. Therefore, a goal needs to be specific. Start with two key components: Industry Function A third key component for many people is geography, if it is integral to the goal (e.g., developing solar energy in northern Africa). Then add the â€Å"do† part – what the work will actually consist of, and what you hope to accomplish. Here are some examples that incorporate the above elements: I plan to return to operations but work at a higher, decision making level, such as Senior Operations Manager, in an East Asian semiconductor firm or a related industry. In this role, I would, for example, oversee $XXX operations, a global high-tech supply chain, and manage a diverse range of technical and business professionals. Currently I’m a BPR consultant; I plan to shift to strategy consulting at a top global firm such as Bain or McKinsey, ideally focusing on clients in the pharma/biomedical space, and help them set up operations in Eastern Europe. To wrap up this section, I’ll add a couple of cautions about this phase of the process: It’s true that your short-term goals operate as a means towards achieving your long-term goals, but don’t simply focus on what you will learn, the experience you will gain, and the people you will meet; short-term goals should also include the elements noted above – what you want to do and accomplish/contribute. Ensure that your goals really require the MBA education. Of course, any learning is helpful for almost any endeavor; but the adcoms want to see that you really need the resources they offer, which they view as precious and not to be squandered. (And they’re right!) Do you need help identifying, defining, and writing about your goals? Work one-on-one with an expert admissions advisor who will help you clarify your goals and present them to the adcom so you get ACCEPTED. Learn more about MBA Admissions Services here. â€Å"What Exactly Are Goals?†Ã‚  is excerpted from the Accepted  guide,  Why MBA?  Click here to download the  complete guide. Cindy Tokumitsu has advised hundreds of successful applicants, helping them gain acceptance to top MBA and EMBA programs in her 20 years with Accepted. She would love to help you too. Want Cindy to help you get Accepted? Click here to get in touch! Related Resources: †¢Ã‚  MBA Admissions A-Z: 26 Great Tips, a free guide †¢ The Importance of Defining Your MBA Goal †¢ Your MBA Goals Essay: Get Ready, Get Set, THINK! What Exactly Are Goals â€Å"I want to move from the buy side to the sell side.† â€Å"I want to shift from technology consulting to investment banking.† Not goals. An engineer once said to me, â€Å"I want to go into either finance or consulting.† Not goals. A goal isn’t something you want, it’s something you do, something you want to achieve, an impact you want to have, and the process you plan on implementing in order to get there. Therefore, a goal needs to be specific. Start with two key components: Industry Function A third key component for many people is geography, if it is integral to the goal (e.g., developing solar energy in northern Africa). Then add the â€Å"do† part – what the work will actually consist of, and what you hope to accomplish. Here are some examples that incorporate the above elements: I plan to return to operations but work at a higher, decision making level, such as Senior Operations Manager, in an East Asian semiconductor firm or a related industry. In this role, I would, for example, oversee $XXX operations, a global high-tech supply chain, and manage a diverse range of technical and business professionals. Currently I’m a BPR consultant; I plan to shift to strategy consulting at a top global firm such as Bain or McKinsey, ideally focusing on clients in the pharma/biomedical space, and help them set up operations in Eastern Europe. To wrap up this section, I’ll add a couple of cautions about this phase of the process: It’s true that your short-term goals operate as a means towards achieving your long-term goals, but don’t simply focus on what you will learn, the experience you will gain, and the people you will meet; short-term goals should also include the elements noted above – what you want to do and accomplish/contribute. Ensure that your goals really require the MBA education. Of course, any learning is helpful for almost any endeavor; but the adcoms want to see that you really need the resources they offer, which they view as precious and not to be squandered. (And they’re right!) Do you need help identifying, defining, and writing about your goals? Work one-on-one with an expert admissions advisor who will help you clarify your goals and present them to the adcom so you get ACCEPTED. Learn more about MBA Admissions Services here. â€Å"What Exactly Are Goals?†Ã‚  is excerpted from the Accepted  guide,  Why MBA?  Click here to download the  complete guide. Cindy Tokumitsu has advised hundreds of successful applicants, helping them gain acceptance to top MBA and EMBA programs in her 20 years with Accepted. She would love to help you too. Want Cindy to help you get Accepted? Click here to get in touch! Related Resources: †¢Ã‚  MBA Admissions A-Z: 26 Great Tips, a free guide †¢ The Importance of Defining Your MBA Goal †¢ Your MBA Goals Essay: Get Ready, Get Set, THINK!

Tiger - Free Essay Example

Sample details Pages: 35 Words: 10510 Downloads: 2 Date added: 2017/09/24 Category Advertising Essay Type Argumentative essay Did you like this example? 60 SMS.. Jasda-e-dost nakam nahi hone denge! Aap ki duniya me shaam nahi hone denge! Dosti ka har imtihan apne sar pe lenge! Par e dost,Aapko kabhi pareshan na hone denge 1) Dil mein aansuyo ke mele hain Tum bin hum bohat akele hain Sab kuch chod kar tumeh MMS karte hain Dekho hum kitne vele hain * vele = lazy (vele is a Punjabi word) 2. Har desh ki ek sarhadd hoti hai bache ki bhi ek jidd hoti hai aur kitna intzaar karru tere sms ka Kanjosi ki bhi koi hadd hoti hai 3. kayi raaz aise hote hain jo dikhaye nahi jaate kayi kisse aise hote hain jo sunaye nahi jaate ayi dil aise hote hain jo tode nahi jaate aur aap jaise dost aise hote hain jo chode nahi jaate. 4. Yaad karte hai tumhe tanhai mein, dil dooba hai gamo ki gehrai mein, hume mat dhoondna duniya ki bhid mein, hum millenge tumhe tumhari parchaai mein.. 5. Humse door jayoge kaise, Dil se hume bhulayoge kaise, Hum to vo khusboo hain jo aapki saanso mein baste hain, Khud ki saanso ko rok payoge kaise 6. Har baar dil se yeh paigaam aaye JubaaN kholu to tera he naam aaye Tum he kyon bhaye dil ko kya malum Jab nazroo ke saamne haseen tmaam aaye 8. You must be a good runner because you are lways running in my mind, you must be a good thief because you have stolen my heart, and i am always a bad shooter because I Miss You Always 9. Shaam hote hii ye Dil udaas hota hai Toote khwaboo ke siwa kuch na pass hota hai Tumahri yaad aise waqt bohat aati hai Bandar jab koi aas-paas hota hai.. 10. Door waadiyoN mein dhundley badal chupkar parvat se milne ka intzaar karte hain, Dil mein tamaam hasarteiN liye hum aapka intzaar karte hain 13. Phool khilte rahein zindgi ki raah mein hassi chamakti rahe aapki nigaah mein kadam kadam par mile khushi ki bhaar aapko dil deta hai yehi dua baar-baar aapko 15. Friendship is like a glass andle it with care because once broken cannot be mended and even if mended. a crack is always there !!! 16. When Nights are long Friends are few, I sit by my Window think of u. a silent whispe r a silent tear. with all my Heart i wish you were here. 17. When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you. Why should only i suffer!!! 18. When the time comes for you to give your heart to someone make sure that u select someone who will never break your heart coz broken hearts have no spare parts. 19. Teri yaad mein humne kalam uthaayi liya paper aur tasveer aapki bnayi ocha tha ki usko dil se laga kar rakhenge magar vo to bacho ko daraane ke kaam aayi 20. Badi asaani se dil lgaaye jaate hain par badi mushkil se waade nibhaye jaate hain le jaati hai mohabbat un raaho par jaha diye nahi dil jalaaye jaate hain 21. Most people walk in and out of your life, but only FRIENDS leave footprints in your heart. 22. Good FRIENDS are hard to find, harder to leave,and impossible to forget. 23. DONT frown. You never know who is falling in love with your smile 24. When it hurts to look back, and youre scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there 25. Aap jaise log hume kuch khas lagte hai. mann me har waqt hum ek aas rakte hai, jaane kab aa jaye sms aapka is liye cell ko dil ke pass rakte hai 26. When u feel sad. To cheer up just go to the mirror and say, damn I am really so cute u will overcome your sadness. But dont make this a habit.. Coz liars go to hell !!!! 27. one day Love and friendship met. Love asked-when i already exist why are you here? friendship replied to make faces smile when u leave the tears!!! Friendship is the best thing in the world as there is no scope for tears if your friend is good. 28. If you love someone, put their name in a circle, nstead of a heart, because hearts can break, but circles go on forever 29. If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldnt jump with them, Id be at the bottom to catch them. A 30. To handle yourself, use your head; To handle others, use your heart. 31. Smile a while and while you smile, smile another smile and soon there will b e miles and miles of smile just because you smiled, i wish your day is full of SMILE 32. Muskura do jara khuda ke vaste, sama-e-mahefil mai rosni kam hai, tum hamare nahi to kya gum hai, hum tumhare to haiN ye kya kam hai? A 33. Hi i am marrying next week there will be a small party and nly few persons will be invited Hey dont bring any gift just bring SOMEONE to marry me.. 35. a friend is sweet when it is new it is sweeter when it is true. but you know that.. it is the sweetest when it is u 37. Chehre pe ashko ki lakeer si ban gayi Jo na chaaha tha vo takdeer si ban gayi humne to chalaayi thi ret pe ungli gaur se dekha to unki tasveer si ban gayi 38. Mountain can fly,river can dry you can forget me but never can iA 39. Tere pyaar ki roshni aisi hai ki har taraf ujaala nazar aata hai sochta hu ki ghar ki bijli katwa du kambaqt bill bohat aata hai 40. Door rehkar bhi yaad karenge eh mat sochna ki bhool jayenge tumeh, agar dost bankar raas na aaye to ajnabi ban kar yaad aayenge tumeh 41. destiny decides who u meet in life but its only your heart that can decide who gets to stay in your life.. 42. Have a heart that never hardens have a smile that never fades have a touch that never burnt and have friendship that never breaks. 43. If u drop me i ill break if u hold me i ill shake if u need me i ill hurry, if u dont call me i ill worry if u hurt me i ill cry but if u leave me i ill die. 44. Meaning of Friendship : F-FOREVER R-RESPONCIBLE IINTELLIGENT +E-EAGER TO MAIL N-NICE D-DIVINE SSIMPLE H-HEARTLY IINTERSTED P-PEACEFUL 45. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot This describes everything youre not 46. I saw your face as you walked by but then I saw a better guy 47. I see your face when I am dreaming Thats why I always wake up screaming 48. My love you take my breath away What have you stepped in to smell this way 49. My feelings for you no words can tell Except for maybe go to hell 50. Of loving beauty you float with grace If only you could hide your face 51. jaw aab teri shayari ka. denge hum shayari mein. naam tera likh baithe hain. apne dil ki diary mein. 52. If u are a chocolate you are the SWEETEST, If u are a teddy bear you are the most HUGGABLE, If u are a star you are the BRIGHTEST, and since you are my friend U R THE BEST !!! 54. Dont shut love out of your life by saying its impossible to find. ;The quickest way to receive love is to give; ;The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; ;And the best way to keep love is to give it wings. 55. Dil ki aavaj bhi sun mere fasaane pe na jaa meri najaroN ki taraf dekh jamaane pe na jaa.. A A A 56. Haseeno ne haseen banke gunaaah kiya, auro ko to theek humko bhi tabaah kiya, pesh kiya jab ghazaloN mein unki bewafaii ko, uro ne to theek unhone bhi waah waah kiya 57. Yeh jo haseeno ke baal hote hai, ladkon ko fassane ke jaal hote hai, na jaane kitno ke khoon piye honge inhone, tabhi to inke honth laal hote haiA 58. Love is sweet poison: Do not consume without your beloveds advise and keep out of reach of children and keep it in cool and dark place. 59. Promise me we are true friends I am lamp you are light I am Coke you are Sprite I am Sawan you are badal I am Normal you are Pagal I am Water you are Tanki I am Tarzan you are Monkey 60. Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye Aur humare dil se awaaz nikalii. Fiteh Mooh Tusin Ethe vii aa gaye !!! It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel. Maybe we have to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one so that when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift. Love is when you take away the feeling, the passion, and the romance in a relationship and find out you still care for that person. Its true that we dont know what weve got until we lose it, but its also true that we dont know what weve been missing until it arriv es. There are things youd love to hear that you would never hear from the person whom you would like to hear from, but dont be so deaf as not to hear it from the one who says it from his heart. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone. Dont go for looks, they can deceive. Dont go for wealth, in the end it fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. There are moments in life when you miss someone so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real. Dream what you want to dream, go where you want to go, be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to all the things you want to do. May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, enough hope to make you happy and enough money to buy me gifts. Always put yourself in others shoes. If you feel it hurts you, it probably hurts the other person too. God saw me hungry he created domino’s pizza God saw me thirsty he created coke. God saw me walking he created Benz. God saw me without any problems he created you. I had a very weird dream last night, I saw that all the devils of the world have died Please message me I am really worried about U †¦. MAY THE LORD REMOVE ALL OBSTACLES SHOWER U WITH HAPPINESS PROSPERITY ALWAYS HAPPY ______________ FESTIVAL Who are we to say : Who’s Hindu ? Who’s Muslim ? When there’s ALI in DIW – ALI RAM in RAM – ZAN Send this SMS to as many friends make INDIA united DREAM makes all things possible HOPE makes all things work LOVE makes all things beautiful SMILE makes all the above work possible So ALAWAYS KEEP SMILING A rich man needs _________, A poor man has __________, If u eat _________ u die ! Only one word fits in all the blanks!! Gandhi kaise ch ali teri Aandhi. Aaya tha langot meh, aur Guhs gaya 500 ki note meh. Money can buy House but not home, Bed but not sleep, Medicine but not health, Money is dirty. It only causes pain suffering. SEND ME U R MONEY BE HAPPY. Once I catch u , I will take u to bed; I will make u hot, I make u sweat; I will make u groan, You will wish u never had me. Yours sincerely MALARIA. What is a Girl Friend ? Addition of PROBLEMS. Subtraction of MONEY. Multiplication of ENEMIES. Division of FRIENDS. 32. A Sardhar boy beaten on his ass by his teacher, goes home, looks at his back in the mirror and says : SAALI NE MAAR MAAR KE DOH TUKDE KAR DIYA !! Why Women are are best civil engineers in the world ? Because they r the only people who can demolish an erection without damaging the structure. Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road WHY ? Just to confirm whether he is going or coming back from the office. What is the similarity between walking on the edge of Mt. Everest and Getting a blow job from an 85 year old woman ? Whatever u do, don’t look down ? mangtha hu to deti nahi JAWAB MERI BAAT KA deti hai to khada ho jata hai ROM ROM JAZBAT KA boli sajan dheere so dalo BALO MEIN PHOOL GULAB KA. Beta bola, â€Å"Papa, Papa, mujhe Bandar dekhna hai† Papa bole, â€Å"Nahin beta, abhi nahin. Abhi Bandar SMS Padh raha hai. †! Darde dil sehna aasan nahi hota, kimti cheez ke her koi kabil nahi hota, Yeh to rab ki meherbani hai warna, Aapsa dost her kisi ko hasil nahi hota. USUALLY, I only send sms’s 2 people who r either VERY CUTE, or VERY SWEET, or VERY SPECIAL, but in your case I am making an exception .. you’re all Three. 19 sardars went for a movie, some asked pajji Aaj koi khas hai, oh nai poster mein Likha hia only above 18 allowed. Man: Boy, what’s u r dad’s name? Boy: his name is LAUGHING. Man: and u r mother name? Boy: SMILING. Man: you must be kidding? Boy: no, that’s by brother, I am JOKING. Kismat kismat ki baat hain aaj din to kal kali raat hain Kabhi dhoop to kabhi barsaat hain Yeh message ka silsila chalta rahega job tak FREE SMS ka saath hai. LOVE is not rotomac – likhte likhte love ho jaye, It is not BPL – believe in the best, It is not LG – digitally yours It is Panparag – ek se mera kya hoga. . A sweeter smile, A brighter day. Hope everything turns out. Great for you today Good morning. Have a nice day. u are an â€Å"I. D. I. O. T. † Intelligent. Decent Impressive Optimistic Talented R u smiling now? *YOU IDIOT* Dosti karo collegewali se, Pyar karo officewali se, Programmed karo padoswali se, Ankh ladao sali se, Love karo dil wali se, Aur maar khao GARWALI SE. New pak team : Wasi chakram, Bekaar Unus, Saeed Janwar, Saklin Gusthak, Injamam Full Duck, Shahid Bhikari, Sohed Muttar, Abdur mazak, Rashid Taklif. Every little smile can touch somebody’s heart May u find 100’s of reason 2 smile today May u be the reason for someone else 2 smile always. Brain to think of u Eyes to look at u Heart to love u Hand to touch u Leg to walk with u Mouth to say I miss u Foot to kick if u SMS me! What is the similarity between love and photograph? Both get developed in dark. A big HELLO 2 my sweet loving sugar coated choco mallow Milk shaky HONEY dipped chiz melting orange juicy mozzarella Pepperoni spicy bacon icy peanut butter FRIEND! A Sardar goes to a hotel and order’s masala pappad without masala. OYA! BOL TARA RA. Daru se Nasha badtha hai, Nashe se junoon, Junoon se mehanth, Mehanth se paise, Paise se izzat, Issile izzat pane ke liye daru peena bahut zaruri hai Cheers. If tomorrow is Sunday before Sunday is yesterday after yesterday is today What is tomorrow after yesterday? I chased love, I found friendship. I chased desire, I found hopes. I chased reality, I found dreams, I chased a chimpanzee and I found u. U can be a doctor save lives A lawyer defend lives A soldier protect lives Or simply be YOURSELF A beautiful friend who touches lives! Look outside its so pleasant, sun is smiling with u Trees dancing for u birds singing for u because this morning I Asked them all 2 wish u â€Å"A WONDERFUL DAY† Good morning. Woh pyar hi kya jisme judai no ho Woh ishq hi kya jisme ladai no ho Woh dil hi kya jisme dard no ho and Who cell hi kya jisme MERA SMS na ho. Aare o Sambha mere kithne SMS mile? Bahut sare, Aur tumne kitne SMS bheje? Ek bhi nahi! Haaak thu. Ab tak bahut SMS khaye, ab goli kha, DHICHAON Today its cool to have small cars small mobiles. Soon the day will come when small brain will be in fashion and Then my friend, u will be a Legend! On a romantic date Sardar girl friend asks him Darling on our engagement will u give me a ring. Sardar sure, why not, give me u r telephone no. Aajkal apke SMS ana bandh hai, Irshad Irshad Aajkal apke SMS ana bandh hai, Kahfa ho mujse ya balance kam hai? One roman girl asks an Egyptian boy, What will u do for me? He replies: Come behind Pyramid I will make u MUMMY! What happened 2 u r cell? Tried calling lots of times very time I dial u r no. the operator says the subscriber u r calling is a Monkey please call the zoo for details? Women is asking another woman friend. Do you speak to your husband while making love? No way, why should I phone him at such a blissful moment? Every morning u r the first thing that comes to my mind. Wish I could start my day with u in my bed. I love u r touch on my lips. U just makes my day. I love u NESCAFE. Sardar giggling behind a man at ATM Centre. Ha ha I have seen u r password. Man: What is it? Sardar: hee hee its four asterisks. ( **** ) Apko miss karna roz ki baat hein, Yad karna adat ki baat hein, Dur rehna kismat ki baat hein, Magar apko jhelna himmat ke baat hein, Wah Wah! I am currently in Korea. Really frustrated because they didn’t believe me when I say we have Monkeys in India. Please send me u r photo I just want 2 shut them up! Do u know t hat a simple hello can be so Sweet? H – How r u E – Everything all right? L – Like to see u. L – Love to hear from u. O – Obviously miss u. So, HELLO. 9 lessons in Life: Learn To Care, To Smile, To Cry, To Give, To Forgive, To Share,To Trust, To Love To sms me daily. If friendship could be bought n sold like Stocks n Shares people who Invested in u, would be Millionaires. Congrats! Your phone has been installed with a new puzzle game. To play, just throw your phone against the wall and arrange the pieces Back. Its fun try it. God is wise that he never created people with price tags, Because if he had, would not have been able to afford for a wonderful And loveable person like u †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ JIN be basi JANAKI, RUM me base RAM, WHISKY me base WISHNU, Aur SHAMPAIGN me base SHYAM. Kis kis ka tyaag karu mein, har bottle me bhagwan. The virtue of true love is not finding the perfect person. But loving the imperfect person perfectly, Love doesnâ⠂¬â„¢t have a happy ending because It simply doesn’t end! What did the gangster’s son tell his dad when he failed his examinations? â€Å"Dad they questioned me for 3 hrs but I never told them anything† U can buy gifts but not love. U can pretend 2 smile but not be happy. U can lie to others but not to u r self. U can have friends but not as sweet as me. 7 rules to be happy: 1; Never Hate. 2; Don’t worry 3; Live simple 4; Expect a little 5; Give a lot 6; Always smile 7; KEEP IN TOUCH WITH ME. Arz kiya hai, yeh matlab ki duniya mein, Kaun kisi ka hota hai†¦ SMS bhi wohi karta hai jisko free hota hai. This morning†¦. May u r burdens be a little lighter, Your pockets a little heavier, Your smile a little wider, And your heart a lot fuller of joy HAVE A NICE DAY. Airhostess 2 laloo†¦ sir r u vegetarian or nonveg. He says no I am Sagittarian She says no sir r u shakahari or masahari, He says no I am BIHARI. Think of me and keep in mind, a faithful friend is hard to find But if you find one equal and true, never leave the old for new Neevu kare maaduthiruva chandadaararu tamma mobile vyapti Pradeshada horage (kunde olege) thallidarey, Swalpa samayada nantara prayatnisi!!!! A Daku entered in a Sardar’s home, Daku: Bol, sona kahan hai? Sardar: oye, poora ghar khali hai, jaha chahe waha so ja. One who smokes gets a smoky heart, One who drinks gets an alcoholic heart, So dear, u must stop eating sweets because U r already a sweetheart†¦.. Ae mere SMS, mere dost ke pass jaana, agar wo so raha ho to Shor mat machana, jab wo jaage to dheere se muskurana, aur kehna HAVE A NICE DAY. Why do we close our eyes when we pray, When we pray, when we cry, when we dream, When we kiss, because the most beautiful things in life r unseen felt only by the heart. To marry: A Sardar selected a short girl why? Because Someone had told him â€Å"Musibat jitni choti ho utna aachha hai. D se Dosti, Dushmani, Dil, Dard, Dillag i, Deewangi, Par D se itne bhi Door na ho jana ki S se SMS bhi na bhej sako! To be disturbed by the beep of a phone only means that â€Å"SOMEHOW† â€Å"SOMEWHERE† â€Å"SOMEBODY† is thinking of u. At this very moment that ME! Take care. Why industrial productivity is so low in kerala? Because 86% of the shift time is spent on lifting folding holding Re-tying the LUNGI. If God answers u r prayer he is increasing u r faith. If he delays, he is increasing u r patience. If he doesn’t answer, he has something better for u! GOD BLESS U. U come at night, u glued u r self to me, U sucked me, u sol walled me, u got great pleasure, u left, Leaving me to suffer †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ U stupid MOSQUITO. Aaj-didar, Kal-yaar, Parso-pyar, Phir-eakrar, Phir-intazar, phir-takrar, phir-darar, saari mehnat-bekar aur aakhir mein –EK AUR DEVADAS AT BEER BAR! We are like tea bags whose real strength comes out when we were put in Hot water. So when problems be set u, just think. U must be GOD’S favorite cup of tea Foreigner, â€Å"hamare waha e-mail se shadi bhi hoti hein†. Sardar, â€Å"hamare yaha to female se hi hoti hai†. What things u should consider before choosing COFFEE GIRL FRIEND? 1; Should be hot. 2; Should be Rich. ; Creamy. 4; Be able to keep u awake all night. 5 great people 1; Gandhiji – woto ab rahe nahi. 2; Devanand – wo kisi kam ke nahi 3; Ashwariya – apni pahoch ke bahar hai. Baki rahe aap aur hum. So keep in TOUCH. Some times I wish I never saw u, Never met u, never spoke 2 u, It’s not because I hate u, Or I don’t like but it’s simply because 1 day I might loose u. Dosti acchhi ho to rang laati hai, Dosti gehri ho to sabko bhati hai, Dosti nadan ho to toot jathi hai, Par Dosti humse ho to itihass ban jati hai. Love in Pakistan, Romance in Afghanistan, Marriage in Rajasthan but don’t increase Population in HIDUSTAN. Because there is no place in ka bristhan. A furious Sardar enters shop shouts, where is my free gift with this Cooking oil? Salesman: iske saath koi gift nahi hai. Sardar: Oye, ispe likha hai, cholesterol FREE! Faithful husbands will go straight to heaven, because They have already gone through HELL! Teacher: kaun si cheez mu me nahi leni chahiye? Student: jalta hua bulb. Teacher: why? Student: Mummy papa se keh rahi thi pehle bulb bujhao, to mu me loongi. Is saal barish jyada hai na. Nahi pagal ye to upar Dhirubhai ro rahe hai, Beta Mukesh ye tune kya kiya mera sapna 501 me bech dia. Humko to apno ne loota, Gairo me kahan dam tha. Hamari kashthi doobi wahan, jahan pani kam tha. To have a friend in my life like u doesn’t mean sailing on boat With no storms rather it means having a boat that can sail in every storm. Court order: u r accused of crawling into my heart and Hijacking my smiles with your cute messages. U r sentence to be my friend for life time – NO BAIL. Classic – A, 2 Seater p lane crashed in a graveyard in Punjab. Local sardars have so for found 500 bodies are still digging for more. Sardar ka beta: kal raat maine bathroom ka darwaja khola to apne aap light jali? Sardar ki maa: kamine tune phirse fridge me susu kiya? In case of â€Å"FIRE† scroll down. Abe Sardar not now. In case of fire only!!!!! Sardar ke jokes pad pad ke tub hi, TARARARA!!!!!!!! Kaun banega crorepathi? Let’s play. Q. Nobody likes u because u r a, A. Pain, B. Headache, C. Irritating. D. Idiot. 50 / 50 Phone a friend? Ring me I will tell u. Answer this: Letter after F + Half of 8 + Opposite of b + Letter b 4 C + Opposite of 7 + Middle of Sea + 19th letter X 2 + Middle of Sun? Message me if u gets answer. Dardedil sehna assan nahi hota Kimti cheez ke her koi kabil nahi hota, Ye rab ki meherbani hai warna, Tum jaise popat ke pass mobile nahi hota. A fat Sardar visits dietitian. Doctor said: run 8 kms for 300 days. After 300 days Sardar phoned: I am slimmer but I am 24 00 kms away from home. Two ladies had waited too long at a bus stop. First lady said â€Å"Even my butts feel asleep† Second lady replied â€Å"Yes, I heard it snoring†. Bush got a coded message from Saddam. It read: 370H SSV-0773H Bush was stunned. He called CIA and they cracked its code by reading it up side down!!!!!! Osama bin laden’s favorite song Main nikla, plane leke, raste main newyork main ek mod aaya Main twin tower tod aaya. When u r down don’t think of me. When u r crying don’t think me. When u r alone even then don’t think of me. Instead call me, I have INCOMING FREE. Khuda se pani manga to sagar diya, Phool manga to bageecha diya, Ghar manga to mahal diya, Paisa manga to app ka number diya. Kab aau lene†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ Dhane Dhane pe lika hai kaane walon ka naam, Paise paise pe lika hai bhikaariyon ka naam. Abhi aajao lene. U know, if any girl says u r Cute, Handsome, Ultimate, Talented, Intelligent, Attractive. The un derstand, she is actually saying, CHUTIA. If I am in hell u in heaven. I always look up proud of u. But if I were in heaven u in hell, I beg god to send me down because heaven won’t be heaven without u. Zindagi ke raahon mein tujhe jo gam milege, mere hoslon se kam milenge, Jab khud ko tanha pao kabhi, kasam dosti ki bus yaad karna aur saamne hum milenge. No Quality + No Style = Laloo. No Quality + Style = Sonia. Quality + No Style = Vajpayee. Quality + Style = GUESS U r right it’s ME. Happiness keeps u sweet, trials make u strong, Sorrows keep u human, failure keeps u humble, Success keeps u glowing God keeps u going. GOD BLEES U. Dosti phool se kya karte ho woh to murza jate hai. Dosti karo to kanto se karo jo chubhne ke baad bhi yaad aate hai. Tum hamesha muskuraate raho Muskuraate raho Muskuraate raho BUS Muskuraate raho Mujhe kya? Log tumhe hi paagal samjhene. Three Monkeys escaped: One found eating banana. Second dancing. Third reading this message. Wif e ka matlab hai Wonderful Instrument For Enjoyment. Neend aathi hai, dard saath lekar. Yaad aathi hai, aapka naam lekar. Mujhe intezar hai, us shaam ka†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ Jo aaegi aapko saath lekar. Koi wada nahi fir bhi tera intazar hai, Judai ke bavjuth bhi tujse pyar hai, Tere chahere ki udasi de rahi hai gawahi, Mujse Milne ke lia tu bhi bekarar hai. A B C D A- u r attractive B- u r the best C- u r cute D- u r dear to me E F G E- u r excellent F- u r funny G- u r good looking H I J K H- He He He I- I am J- Just K- Kidding. All mornings r like paintings, U need a little inspiration to get u going, A little smile to brighten it and a message from Some one who cares to colour u r day. Two Sardar’s watching cricket, when sachin hit a boundary, 1st said: dekho GOAL HUA. 2nd said: GOAL isme nahi CRICKET me hota hai. Sardar stopped sleeping with his wife †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦..! Some one told him – shaadi shuda aurat ke saat sona paap hai!!! Sardar reads a poster outside police st ation. â€Å"WANTED† for rape and murder. He goes in says sir I want to apply for that job. 60. I wanted to kill the sweetest, smartest, sexiest, handsome the most beautiful person on earth, but then I thought †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. SUICIDE is a crime. Phool ki shuruvat kali se hoti hai. Zindagi ki shuruvat janse hoti hai. Pyar ki shuruvat dosti se hoti hai. Aur dosti ki shuruvat aapse hoti hai. x You me do it in bed, do it in car, do it standing, do it sitting, do it in room, But its best doing it lying down. Hey don’t we? In these positions do SMS. You may have someone in your mind, someone in your heart Someone is your dreams, some one in your life But I am your someone when u have no one. Sardarji sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. A few seconds later he received a report and started dancing. Report read: sardarni delivered. Bolo tara ra ra. your friendship is a blank Cheque For me it’s an asset not a liability Always a credit not a debit Always a profit not a loss and I hope it will never bounce. Raped girl to police: Saab, 1 ne meri gaand mari, 2 ne chut chodi, 3 ne ball dabaye, 4 ne kiss kiya. Officer: Sali F I R likha rahi hai ke lund utta rahi hai? Zindagi is to be lived, Dil is to be given, Pyar is to be shared, Gham is to be fought, Khushi is to be achieved. Dushmani is to be forgotten And teri meri dosti is to be for ever. Chandra mukhi ki chand jaise choot me Devdas ka dande jaisa lund dala tho Wo chilla kar boli Maar daala o†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. Maar daala. After a great sex with his GF, BF saw a picture of a nude male In GF’s Walllet. BF: you’re ex BF? GF: Silly, that was me before the operation. One day I read smoking is bad, I stopped smoking. One day I read drinking is bad, I stopped drinking. One day I read fucking is bad, I stopped †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ Reading. If u read this, I am smart, If u save this u agree I am smart, If u forward this, u are spreading that I am smart, And if u deletes this you are jealous because I am smart. I trust u a lot because u are my close friend but why do u talk Behind my back? Why don’t u tell me frankly? Why you telling every one I am BORN SMART. Khudko jala ke roshani dena shama ki adat hai. Apko hasana hamari chaht hai. Free hai SMS to kay hua? Apna time gavake aapki hasi pana hamari fidrat hai. What is the name of a Russian doctor who is specialist in piles? Dr. YAKO THIKA NOVA. Exams are like Girl friends. 1; Too many questions. 2; Difficult to understand. 3; More explanation needed. 4; Result is always not up to mark. Females have 4 specialties. 1; They get WET without bath. ; Bleed without injury. 3; Give milk without eating grass. 4; Lastly they make boneless objects hard. Thank u for calling 1900.. NEED SEX HOTLINE. For hot sex press 1, For breast sex press 2, For combination sex press 3, For oral sex press 0. To end this call press your balls. Lights went of in girls hostel The watchman called up Ele ctricity Office and Says â€Å"Send your men immediately because the girls are using Candles†. Man marries deaf girl. He says we must work our a code: If I want sex I will stroke your left breast You reply by pulling my Penis once for YES or 50 times of NO. Neevu kare maaduthiruva chandadaararu vyapthi pradeshada horage tamma Thika toleta iddare swalpa samayada nantara prayathnisi. A man is carrying three babies in a train. Lady sitting next asks: Are they your babies? Man: No I work for a condom factory and these are CUSTOMER COMPLAINTS!!!!!!! Santa was crying outside Metropolis lab. Banta asked him why? Santa: Blood test karwane aaya tha, ungly kaat di. Banta: Bappre†¦.. mujhe to urine test karana hai. Boy to a Girl: Kash khuda ne mainu brush banaya honda ta Main tere mu vich firna si. Girl: thoda vada banaya honda te tu flush vich ferna si†¦ Arz kiya hai †¦ Tere gar par sanam hazar baar aayenge †¦ Tere gar par sanam hazar baar aayenge, Kunki kunki ghanti bajainge aur bhag jayenge. Two Sardar were walking, a car splashed lot of water on them. First Sardar – iski ma ki chut, Second Sardar – yaar chut se yaad aaya bhabhiji kaisi hain. Please remind me to remind u about reminding me to send u this reminder that reminds me of reminding u that u never have to remind me to remember u. 7 rules to be happy: 1; Never hate 2; Don’t worry 3; Live simple 4; Expect a little 5; Give a lot 6; Always smile 7; Have a cute friend like me. A mobile is like a woman – talks non – stop, Costs a fortune, disturbs when you are busy and when you need it urgently – there is no service. What has 6 feet, 9 heads, 1 leg, 5 hands, 7 eyes, 13 ears, 3 mouths, 1 finger, 8 Stomachs, 4 brains stop thinking and get back to work, There is nothing like that. Value each precious moment†¦.. Morning brings hope†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. Afternoon brings faith†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. Evening brings love†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. Night brings rest †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. Wish u find them all today. Good day. What is the similarity between Donkey and Sardar? Ans: dono bachpan mein SUNDER hote hai aur bade hoke TRANSPORT ka dhandha karte hai. Hi, I sent my cares to the wind†¦.. And asked the wind to pass it to you. When you feel the breeze against u r face, it’s me saying â€Å"Take Care† always. I saw u on the road that day†¦ U were looking so fine, u r face so divine, U r walk so perfect, my heart started singing a song†¦. WHO LET THE DOG OUT †¦ BOW †¦. BOW†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. Have u done two of the most important things when you woke up today? 1; PRAY, so that u may live 2; TAKE SHOWER, so that other may live too!! GOOD MORNING. A Sardar dies due to lighting. His dead body is found smiling. Everybody is wondering why? When god asks him, he says â€Å"I thought somebody was clicking my snap†. Har nazar me ek khwaish hoti hai Har dil me ek chahat hoti hai, Mumkin nahi har ek ke liye TAJM AHAL banana, Kyu ki har dil me 4 – 5 MUMTAZ jo hoti hai. Today, tomorrow and forever there will be one heart that would always Beat for you. You know who’s †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. Your own stupid. At a dance party while dancing with a beautiful girl a boy said â€Å"Before I met you, my life was like a desert† Girl: that’s why u dances like a camel. Two males at a mall looking for their lost wives. 1st: how does your wife look like? 2nd: she is blond, white, big breasts a firm ass, yours? 1st: forget her lets look for yours. Never abandon old friends they are hard to replace. Friendships are like wine, it gets better as it grows older. Just like us†¦. I get better, u get older. In a funeral heart shaped coffin was made for a cardiologist. One of the doctor started to laughing. When asked why? He said: I am thinking of my funeral. I am a gynecologist. Sorry for disturbing u at this time. I need your help. But only if u r not busy. If don’t m ind, if u can and if its not disturbing u . Please DELETE this message. What is the meaning of 3G-CDMA written on reliance handset. 3 Gujrathi Chor – Dhiru, Mukesh, Anil. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z The person who invented alphabets was great. But he did a silly mistake by placing â€Å"U† and â€Å"I† far away. Jab tumhara msg. aata hai mera rom rom machal jaata hai Ang ang mein gud gudi hoti hai, Yeh msg. ka kasoor nahi hai. Kambakht mobile hi vibration par hota hai. Life is like Maths: Friend do + karo, Dushman ko – karo, Khushia ko x karo, Gam ko / karo aur Life ko totally enjoy karo. Husband asks: do u know the meaning of WIFE. It means Without Information Fighting Every time. Wife on hearing this says, it could also mean With Idiot For Ever. Zindagi ki har dagar par or har mod per miltehain dost aap jaise. Na jaane bhagwan ne itne manufacturing defect kiye kaise? Laloo went to USA to learn English, after 3 months Rabrid evi phones to Bush and asks, is laloo learing English. Bush: e sasura kabhi aungreji hani seekh saktha. . Agar apko raat ki tanhai mai koi tang kare apko karwate badlne pe majboor Kare, chupke se kan mai sargoshi kare aur gaal chum le†¦. To ALLOUT lagao machar bhagao. No sweet thoughts to forward No cute graphics to send Just a Friend saying take care.! Pholo ki har kali khusbu de aapko. Suraj ki har kiran roshani de aapko. Hum to kuch den eke qabil nahi magar dene wala har kushi de aapko. Sharab ek bimari hai, jo is samaj ko barbad kar rahi hai. Ao milke kasam khaye ki is bimari ko khatam kar denge. Ek botal aap khatam karo ek hum kardenge CHEERS. A sardar lost his donkey but still he was dancing. Some one asked him why was he dancing? Sardar said â€Å"acha hua main gadhe pe nahi baitha tha varna main bhi kho jata† Ye meri talash ka kasur hai, ya meri wafa ka jurm hai, Jo dil ke bahut pass hai, wo hi nazar se itne dur hai. Pathar pani mein mat pheko, use koi aur bhi pita hai, Jindagi jina hai to haske jio, tumhe dekhar koi aur bhi jita hai. What is the full form of singh? S – sardar I – insaan N nahi G – gadha H – hai. Ham tere dil mein rehenge ek yaad bankar tere lab pe khilenge muskan bankar kabhi apne se juda mat samjna hum tere sath chalenge assman bankar. Wife sleeping in the middle of the night suddenly wakes up. Quick ! my husband is back!. Man gets up, jumps of window, and then realizes, shit, I am the husband. The world doesn’t need more Mountains to climb, Seas to cross, Stars to shine, What the world needs is only more of u and your smile. Duniya mai bahut gham milenge, sach mano ache dosth kam milenge, Jis mod par sab chod denge sath tumhara, dosth Usi mod par khade hum milenge. When Titanic was drowing, an Italian asks sardarji, How far is land? Sardar: 2 KMs. Italian jumps into sea asks: which direction? Sardar: downwards. One advice: Take care. One request: Be your self. One wish: donâ €™t forget me ever. One lie: I hate you. One fact: you’re a dear friend of mine. The human brain is the most outstanding thing. It functions 24 hours. It functions right from the time you are born until you fall in love. Its spring. The birds are doing it, The bees are doing it, The butterflies are doing it, Should we also do it? FORGET IT. HUMANS CAN’T FLY!!!!!!!! What is a similarity between mobile and marriage? Kash thode din aur ruk jaata to accha model mil jaata. Do you know who is the greatest secret agent in the world? Sardarji, because he don’t remember any thing. Stars + Moon = Romantic Night. Birds + Sky = Lively day. Forest + Animal = Freshing World. You + Your Smile = DARNA MANA HAI. Marwadi man on his death bed. My wife are u here? Yes my husband. My daughter are u here? Yes my papa. My son are u here? Ya. Haram khor phir dukan pe kaun hai? Heart beats are countless. Spirits are ageless. Dreams are endless. Memories are timeless. A friend lik e u shameless. Oops†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. SORRY PRICELESS. Do ladka †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ aha! Raat ke andhere me †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦aha! Jahri ke pichhe†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. aha! Daba daba ke †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦aha! Chus chus ke †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦aha! Frooti pe rahe the†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦aha! Happy moments – Praise God. Difficult moments – Seek God. Quite moments – Worship God. Painful moments – Trust God. Every moment – Think of God. If I could pull down the rainbow I would write your name in it and Put it back to the sky, to let every body know how colourful my life is with a friend like you. Hasna hamara kisiko gawara nahi hota, Har musafir jinkagi ka sahara nahi hota, Milte hai bahut log is tanha jindgi mein, Par koi dosth tumsa pyara nahi hota. I can’t hide this from you anymore. I don’t want to hurt you and I feel its best if I tell you, Before you hear it from someone else†¦.. Half kg SURF EXCEL is now Rs. 45/- only. Every life in this world was painted by God’s own hands. That’s why I am thankful because as he painted my life he included one lovely colour you as my friend. Hearts could only love for a while you can put many relations in a life, You can make a desert from the Nile, but you can’t stop my smile when I see your name on my mobile. Dil ke rishtey ajeeb hote hain. Dhoor reh kar bhi kareeb hote hain. Jo log apko roz dekhte hain woh log kitne kushnaseeb hote hain. A baby monkey asked its mother why are we so ugly. Then it says that we are better just look at the person reading this message. Mushkil se ghabrake ab jeena nahi chahate, Door tumse hoke ab rehna nahi chahate, Yun to dost bahut bane is zindagi main, Par tujh jaisa dosth khona nahi chahate. A Daughter send sms to her father on clearing B. Ed exam, Which father receives as: Father, your daughter has been successful in BED. A sardar suddenly jumps on the railway track. A man shouts: marna hai kya? Sardar: abbey suna nahi, Gujrat express platform per aah rahi hai. Chandni raat thi. Oh mera sath thi. Mein us ke upar tha. Oh mera neeche thi, Daro math yaro oh mera cycle thi. Our friendship is not like NIKE – JUST DO IT. Not like PEPSI – YEH DIL MANGE MORE. Not like WILLS – MADE FOR EACH OTHER. But like FEVICOL – YEH MAJBUT JOD HAI TUTEGA NAHI. She came at night explored my body got on top of me touched me, She bit sucked, swallowed was satisfied she left, I was hurt Bloody mosquito. Yaad karke hame, rho pada hai zamana, Hum kya cheez aaj ye unki ansuwon se jaana. Smile you make it least at but you to this sent who person the curse probably will u backwards this read you after confused. Read it backwards. I sent my cares to the wind and asked the wind to pass them to you, When you feel the wind blowing against your face, that’s me saying TAKE CARE. Today is international day for the mentally disabled people. Plea se send an encouraging message to a mentally disabled friend, As I just did. A request to you please doesn’t go out for next 2 hrs†¦ DOG catching van is on work in your area. Gham aur tanhai me jiye ja rahe hai. Tera naam dil me liye ja rahe hain, Ek tum ho ki SMS karne ka naam nahi lete, Ek hum hai ki SMS kiye ja rahe hain! Dard ko bhi ab dard hone laga, Dard khud hi ghaav barne laga, Dard ke mare hum na roye kabhi, Dark khud humko chu kar rone laga. Do you know the definition of a lecturer? A person who has a bad habit of talking which some one is sleeping. Why did sardarji stand in front of a mirror with his eyes closed? He wanted to see how he looks when he is sleeping. BOLO TARA RARA. What’s the similarity between a Dinosaur and an intelligent sardar? Dono ab is duniya mein nahi rahe. A good friend is like a computer. He ENTER’s your life. SAVE’s you in his heart. FORMAT’s your problems and never DELETE’s you from his RAM. Why a re married women heavier than single woman? Single women come home, see what is in the fridge and go to the bed. Married women come home, see what is in bed and go the fridge. What is the difference between stress and tension? Stress is when wife is pregnant, Tension is when girl friend is pregnant. Special friends are really really hard to find. Specially those who are cute and pure in heart. It’s so hard. So my advice for you is never let me go. How can I spell S_ccess without U? Or C_te? Or H_mble? Or F_n? or F_t_re Or even Tr_st? What will I do without U, my friend? So Sweet is your smile, so Sweet is your style, so Sweet is your voice, so Sweet is your eyes, see how Sweetly I lie. Jigar: na phool me, na bahaar me, na bottle me, na jaar me, na bike pe, Na car me, na peace me, na war me. Ab to hamare din guzarthe hai appke SMS ke intazaar me. Sardar at an art gallery. I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art? Art Dealer: I beg your pardon sir , that’s a mirror. Ek tanha raat mein apki yaad aaye, Tanhai mitane ko humne ek cigrate salgai, Na jane kaise quyamat ho gaya ke dhooey neb hi apki tasvir banayi. Now at this time in the world 41% people will be doing job. 32% entertaining, 16% helping others, 7% sleeping, 3% roaming, But one FOOL will be reading this message†¦.. Judge: why did you shoot your wife instead of her lover? Accused: your honour, I am sure you will agree with me that its easier to shoot 1 woman than shooting a man every week. One kiss is not enough if I can have two. One hug is not enough if I can have two. One touch is not enough if I can have two. But one friend is enough if I have you. WARNING: be careful when a girl tells you that she loves you from the bottom of her heart, for this may mean that there is enough space for another guy on top. Aaj – dedar, Kal – Yaar, Parso – Pyar, Phir – ikrar, Phir – intazaar, Phir – takarar, Phir – darar , sari mehnat – bekar aur aakhir me Chandani bar†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦! Tusi great ho†¦ rasgulla ke plate ho†¦ Ande ke amlet ho†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. Sms karne me bade late ho†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. Jalabi ki tarah straight ho†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ Par jo bhi ho tusi mere favourite ho†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. U like which pussy? Small pussy, Big pussy, Hairy pussy, Wet pussy, White pussy, Black pussy, Because our cat gave birth to 6 kittens and I am distributing. Chand ko tod du, Suraj ko Fod du, Tu sirf ek baar haa kar ke dekh†¦ Tere liye main pehli waali ko chood du. When you find a dream inside your heart don’t ever let it go Because dreams are the tiny seeds from which beautiful tomorrow grows. Have a beautiful dream tonight. Har subha ki dhund kuch yaad dilati hai Har phool ki khushbu ek jadu jagathi hai. Chaho no chaho kitna bhi, par aapki yaad aa hi jathi. If you feel stressed out, try to have S. E. X. It helps you to relax. Do you know how to have S. E. X.? Let me teach you : S-sleep, E-eat and X-xercise! Don’t think dirty. Shadi karna the par kismat khuli nahin. Taj mahal banana tha par Mumtaz mili nahin. Ek din, kismat khuli shadi huyi. Ab Taj banana hai, Par ye Mumtaz marthi nahin. Sardarji, tell me, what is the meaning of SMS? Sardar it means S-sardaro ka M-mazes udane ki S-service. Please pray for me because I just get my medical report. My condition is critical as days pass by I become smarter! Don’t worry its not contagious but its incurable. How do you drown a submarine filled with sardars? Just knock at the door. Her koi pyar ke liye rota hai, Her koi pyar ke liye tadptha hai. Mere pyar ko galat mat samajana, pyar tho dosti main bhi hota hai. Dur wadiyon mein dhundley badal, chupakar parvat se pyar karte hai, Dil mein tamam hasratein liye hum apse, milne ka intazaar karte hai. Mera dil hai AIRCONDITION, Usme nahi kisi ko PERMISSION, Sirf tujhe hai dost ADMISSION, Woh bhi bina DONATION. Kahat kabir suno bahi sadhu aisa din bhi ayega Computer pe hoga sex aur baccha fax se ayega!!!!!!! Chand taron ka noor tuj par barse, har koi teri chahat ko tarse. Teri zindagi me aen itni khushian, ke tu ek gam paane ko tarse†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. Apko mulayam ki akal, laloo ki sakal, mayawati ki vani, jaya jaisi jawani, Kalam jaise baal, Vajpayee jaisi chaal mile this is the subh kamnaye for audha pooja. On marriage, every wife treats her husband as GOD. Later the alphabets are reversed!!!!!! Relationship is like a guitar†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦. Music may stop†¦ now and then, but strings are always attached forever. Likewise even if you be in touch or not, you are always remembered. Ye appun ka hi sms hai Aakhen phadd phaad kar kya dekhrela hai. Abbey chup chap mooh dhoke oot ja Appun GUD MORNING bolrela hai. Mera dil jigar kidney liver ho tum, Waqt bewaqt aaye wo fever ho tum, Doobkar jisme kho jau wo river ho tum, Jeevan me ab to friend forever ho tum. As the day turns into night keep your worries out of sight No matter how tough the world may seem, you still deserve the SWEETEST DREAM! Good Night. You will always impress people because you have talent, Looks, Intelligence and if that isn’t enough tell then you are MY FRIEND. Guzre huve kal ki yaad ati hai, kuch lamho se ankhen bhar athi hai, Woh subah rangeen woh shaam nirali duub jati hai, Jab aap jaise dosto ki yaad ati hai. My friendship is like an onion which has many layers in it. It will add taste to your life but if you try to cut it you will have tears in your eyes. Let me kiss your lips. Let me feel your teeth. Let me taste your tongue. SMILE! This is your friend fresh moments, reminding you to brush your teeth every morning and night. Ajanabee hote hue bhi apno sa rishta nibhate hai aap, Na jaane kyon dil ko itna lubhate hai aap, Ye kaisa karishma hai aap ka, jo hum ko itna yaad aate hai aap†¦. Naa dil mein tamanna hogi, naa khwaab koi, Tab kya aaega kisi ka jawab koi, toot jaaega dhadkano se dil ka rishta Jab hoga sms par ch arge koi. Earth may stop rotating. Birds may stop flying. Candles may stop melting. Heart may stop beating. But I will never stop disturbing you. Open your eyes recall all the sweet memories in your heart. Think of all the beautiful things in your life and surrender your self to a sweet day, GOOD MORNING. Bhikari: 501 deede baba, Ambani ke naam pe dede, tu 501 dega Ambani tujhe ek mobile dega, teen mahino se bill nahi bhara Ambani ke naam pe dede baba. Yahaan bearish behall hai. Na sur hai na tall hai. Aaj tumhara SMS factory mein kya hartal hai? A special friend is hard to find, they are rare and one of a kind I don’t care if I have the best that includes â€Å"U†. If yesterday didn’t end up the way you planned, just remember, GOD created today for you to start a new one the best is yet to come have a good day. The quietest place in the world. The complaint department at a parachute packing plant. A sardar tells his friend, I think my wife is having an af fair with a horse. I found a pair of underwear’s! Under the bed with label â€Å"Jockey† on them. Oranges grow in Australia, peaches grow there too, But it takes a country like INDIA, to grow a NUT like you. Heart beats are countless, sprits are ageless, Dreams are endless, memories are time less and Some one like you is useless. College me school ki yad aee, budhape me bachpan ki yad aee, Katonko chhuaa to pholon ki yad aee, zindagi ko karibse dekha to sirf app ki yaad aee†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ Namaste: mobile aaj tak mein aapka swagat hai. Mukhya Samachar: good morning have a nice day. Mausam: aaj bhi sms bearish ki jari lagi rehegi. Happiness keeps you sweet, trails make you strong, Sorrows keeps you human, failure keeps you humble, Success keeps you glowing and god keeps you going. Relationship is like a garden. It’s beautiful when watered with love, hugs, tears and cheers. But it dries up if left untouched†¦.. Keep in touch always. Marriages, 5 Nama z, 6 Eids, 12 Kids, 30 Rozas, 57 Supporting Countries, 9487 Drug cases, 1 lakh Terrorist, 10 lakh Smugglers, 20 Billion US $ loan makes one PAKISTAN. Ap kya jano hum kitna yaad karthe hai, mano ya no mano, Har pal fariyaad karthe hai, roz khat likhte hain CARTOON NETWORK ko aur bas aphika dikhane ki maang karte hain. I know sending so many SMS to you is bad. So I will send you only on days starting with T like Tuesday, Thursday, Today, Tomorrow, Taturday, Tunday every Tingle day†¦. Otay? Dil main hamesha ek shore ho raha hai, Bina SMS ke dil bor ho raha hai, Kahi aisa to nahi, koi pyara so dosth humse DOOR ho raha hai. Kadam Kadam pe hawaon se talukh rekhna, Dosthi ke daur pe dosthi ka aasra rakhna, Hamari yaadon ke SMS zarur ayege Aap bas apna inbox khali rakna. Tumhare naam ki gazalein chand par likhne ko ji chahta hai†¦. Par kya karu yeh jaalim khwab amavas ki raat ko hi atha hai. Ek Dosth ka dosth se wada hai. Marte dum tak nibhayege, Maut aye to tumse pehle hum ja yenge. Tum ko na bhool payenge, tumhe bhi sath le jayenge. Kai raaz aise hote hai jo kahe nahi jate, kai dil aise hote hai jo tode nahi jate, Aur kuch dosth app jaise hote hai jo chode nahi jate. Why do donkeys keep showing their teeth make a funny sound? Even you would, only if your dick touches the ground while waling. Chand adhura hai sitaron ke bina, Gulshan adhura hai baharon ke bina, Samandar adhura hai kinaron ke bina, mare dosth mera mobile adhura hai tumhare SMS ke bina. Humne manga tha sath unka, Woh humein judai ka ghamde gaye. Hum yadon ke sahare phir bhi ji lete, Woh unhe bhool jane ki kasam de gaye. This cat is cat, the cat best cat, way cat to cat, keep cat a cat, fool cat busy cat, For cat 30 cat seconds†¦. Now read again without the word cat. Girls are bad and dirty. Girls make you greedy and make enemies. Girls make your life hell. I am your friend and don’t want worries for you. So please send all your girlfriends to me. What is hard and hairy on the outside, soft and wet on the inside, Begins with letter C ends with T and has the letter U and N in the middle? COCONUT. What do you do when a sardar throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back. What do the Bermuda triangle and blondes have in common? They have both swallowed a lot of semen. What did the god say when he created the first Negro? Oh shit! Jal gaya!!!!!!! Yaad karte hai tumhe tanhai me, dil dooba hai gamo ki geharai me, Humein mat dhoondo duniya ke bhidme, hum milenge tumhe fir kisi free SMS ki scheme me. Sincere apology if you don’t like any of my SMS, then don’t like to read, Then please don’t hesitate feel free to through your MOBILE. Lady drinking Coke, machhar falls in. Lady takes it out. Machhar says Maa! Lady asks why you called me Maa. Machhar says main teri Coke se nikla hoon, Maa. Shores never meet but share the same ocean. The moon and stars could not be one yet they are in one sky. Friends don’t meet often b ut friendship never ends†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. A wife was asked: do you talk to your husband after sex? She replied: depends, if there is a phone nearby. I love you I love you very much I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I LOVE YOU SPECIALLY BECAUSE â€Å"MENAKA GANDHI† SAID TO LOVE ANIMALS†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ Scientists are trying to figure out how long a person can live without brains. Please tell them your age†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦..!!!!!!!!!!!!! Some friends are separated by time, some by differences, Some by distances, some by pride, but no matter how far you are and how busy we may, you will always be special to me. Life gives answer in three ways†¦. It says YES. And gives you what you want. It says NO. It gives you something better. It says WAIT. And gives you the best in its own time. I believe got created me to be your friend. He picked me out from all the rest Because, he knows I am one of the best! Hay †¦.. Don’t argue with GOD. I feel a feel of funny feel and if you feel the feel same as I feel and if I feel the feel same as you feel, it’s nothing but a feel of â€Å"FRIENDSHIP†. No Special reason for this message, I just want to steal a single moment out Of your busy day and hope to make you smile when I say hey take care be happy always. Sardar returns book to library, bangs it on table and says, too many characters, no story, at all. Librarian says so you are the one who took the telephone directory. Humans fall in love, that’s normal, Cows eat grass, that’s ok. But when MONKEYS press cell phone keypads INCREDIBLE! Still pressing? UNBELIEVABLE! Friends are like shoes, some loose and some tight and some fit just right. They help you as you walk through life, thanks for being my size†¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. Life without you is impossible. You are in my breath, In my blood, can’t stay for a second without you. If you are not the re I am dead. Hello, I am talking about OXYGEN. A current survey says: Sexy girls use AIRTEL. Rich girls use HUTCH. Naughty girls use SPICE. And beggars use RELIANCE. I mix RUM with water, I felt drunk. I mix GIN with water, I felt drunk. I mix WHISKY with water then also felt drunk. I swear from today I will never drink? WATER! One day you will be surprised to see me beside you, You me laughing, you me crying, you me dreaming, You I just, you me sitting in a MENTAL HOSPITAL; Me visiting you. If kiss is a wave, I give you sea, If hug is a leaf, I give you tree, If love is planet, I give you galaxy, If friendship is life, I give you mine. Gorgeous, intelligent, kind, sweet, charming, witty, hilarious, friendly, Well enough about me! How are you? Some people have 5 senses. Some may have six. You are a gifted person As you have the 7th sense. â€Å"NON – SENSE†. What is the best thing about babies? MAKING THEM. I am so concerned about you always, I have been th inking of telling you this, All these days but †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ please wear a helmet while you ride †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. As you see empty things break easily. A line †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ Knows no limit, Unless you put an end to it. Hope our friendship is a line that runs †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦ †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.. †¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢â‚¬ ¦Ã¢ € ¦. forever!!!!!!!!! Wonderful people are carefully created by GOD, Wonderful moments are carefully planned by GOD, Wonderful friends like you are carefully gifted by GOD. I must be tired because you have been running through my mind. You must be a good thief because you have stolen my heart and I must be a bad shooter because I keep missing you. Leaves don’t just fall from the tree, Clouds don’t just form in the sky, Angels don’t just come down from heaven, And I don’t just message any one unless they are special like you. One of the qualities I like most about you is that you are very sentimental. % Senti and 99 % Mental. Nari, Nuri, Hari, Jari, Mari, Please remove â€Å"ri† in all words and read this message to interrupt who you are. When the worlds is spinning you are your heart is beating fast, You think it is love? NO stupid you have got high B. P. Osama consults a Psychic about the date of his death. Psychic: you will die on an US holid ay. Which one? Any day you die shall be an US holiday. Star has 5 end, square has 4 end, triangle has 3 end, line has 2 and Life has one end but out friendship has no end. One sardar asked 2nd sardar what is first Hen or Egg? 2nd said hen 1st and then egg. st asked why? He said hen will be in the front and the egg comes from back so. A sardar bought a lottery and he won one lakh. He went to agent and asked his prize amount agent said he will pay him 20,000 now and the rest in 4 installments sardar said give the prize money now or return my 5 Rs. the lottery prize. Teacher: Before they thought that earth was flat and if we go near the sea and if we cross it you fall, after you come to know that earth is round Teacher asked student give me the reason that why earth is round? Student: Because 1. My mom says that 2. My dad agree with my mom Don’t waste time! Our writers will create an original "Tiger" essay for you Create order

Descriptive Essay Crap Hunting Car - 913 Words

I woke up hearing the infuriating and pulsating ring of my alarm, I checked the calendar, another Sunday, just like any other, hunting day. I assembled my weapons into my reliable black duffle bag; a silenced handgun, a military-grade pocket knife and my SR-25 sniper rifle. Wearing a pair of ripped jeans as faded as erased blue pencil markings, and a grey hoodie that hugged every crevice of my muscular torso, I headed out to my black Ford pickup truck. Throwing the duffle bag into the passenger seat with the force of a raging lion, I hopped into the driver’s seat like a swift cougar. While starting the engine, it made the sound the all too familiar sounds; kch, kch, kch kch kch kch kvooom, I thought to myself â€Å"I should really get this†¦show more content†¦Slowly and helplessly, she fell into an eternal slumber. After performing the deed, I lugged her lifeless body towards the kitchen frantically. While preparing my butchering tools, I heard delicate footsteps d own the stairs. My heart sank like the tragedy of the Titanic and my blood ran as cold as the iceberg it hit. Desperately, I tried to conceal my victim but it was too late. I saw the joyful innocent face of my brother trying to surprise me turn to a gut-wrenching face of disgust and horror when one sees a cannibal. His shriek roared through the house trembling the ground. In an act of panic, I slit his throat. My one and only brother, dies at the age of twenty one to his own sibling. An unfathomable feeling of sorrow and remorse ran through my rigid body. I began to blubber spontaneously kneeling over my brother’s corpse. I began to question all of my life decisions and whether or not I deserved to live. As I kneeled there crying rivers, My mother walked in. â€Å"James! I’m here to visit you! Where’s your brother? I saw his car parked in the driveway, but I can’t hear him singing happy birthday to himself!† she sang in her cheery voice. Suddenly, I remembered it was my brother’s birthday and another wave of misery flooded my body. â€Å"I can’t let my feelings get to me now, I can’t let mother know!† I thought. Slowly, I approached my mother at the front door steering her away from my scene of chaos. â€Å"Thank you for surprising me! Sam is just upstairs, let’s goShow MoreRelatedLogical Reasoning189930 Words   |  760 Pagesreasons why he looks that way. The case against Mayfield isnt proven, at least not beyond a shadow of a doubt. Better that five robbers go free than one innocent person gets locked up. What do the rest of you jurors think? Dr. White: Thats just crap! Hes guilty! Listen, you cant call that nice young white clerk a liar. Its Mayfield whos the liar! If all this is supposed to contain an example of good reasoning, what is so good about it? Well, first, Jones uses the following principle ofRead MoreDeveloping Management Skills404131 Words   |  1617 PagesCoaching and Counseling 244 Coaching and Counseling Problems 245 Defensiveness and Disconfirmation 246 Principles of Supportive Communication 247 Supportive Communication Is Based on Congruence, Not Incongruence 247 Supportive Communication Is Descriptive, Not Evaluative 248 Supportive Communication Is Problem-oriented, Not Person-oriented 250 Supportive Communication Validates Rather than Invalidates Individuals 251 Supportive Communication Is Specific (Useful), Not Global (Nonuseful) 253 SupportiveRead MoreProject Mgmt296381 Words   |  1186 Pagesaccomplishments in each LEED category: Sustainable Site †¢ †¢ 47,000 tons of Mueller Airport runway material was reused on site. About 40 percent fly ash instead of Portland cement in concrete yields a drop in carbon dioxide emissions equivalent to taking 450 cars off the road. 925 tons of construction waste was rec ycled on site. Dell Children’s Becomes World’s First â€Å"Green† Hospital* Energy Efficiency and Energy Conservation †¢ †¢ An on-site natural gas turbine supplies all electricity, which is 75 percent